Monday, June 21, 2010

Happy Dad's Day! (a day late)

So I know I am bias but, I do have the best dad in the whole wide world.  He is the most caring, self sacrificing man.  He would go to the ends of the earth for his family.  Just don't ask him to help you with something while he is watching The Situation Room on CNN.... he won't be helping till it's over.  I am so thankful that I was blessed with a father who taught me values, what it means to love and serve in your family, and how to hold Christ in the center of your life above all else.  I love this picture that was taken at my wedding after I got to dance with him to "My Brown Eyed Girl".

He is wonderful...Thank you Dad for all the love you have poured into my life! I LOVE YOU!

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Attempt #2 at Blogging

Well this is try #2. The other night I worked for about 3 hours on my first post-- only to have selected the bottom sentence to delete and it deleted the whole post.  :(  Needless to say- I am fed up with Blogspot and not too sure about this whole thing.  However, I have been blog stalking for so long I have finally given in and decided to start a blog.  I figured it's a good way to document the ups and downs of life, blessings, and trial, the good times, the bad, etc...So here we go.

Tigh and I have been married for almost 3 months now.  I have to honestly say being a wife has been way more challenging then I thought it was going to be, but way more of a blessing, and way more fun then I thought it was going to be too.  I LOVE coming home to Tigh everyday.  I feel like each and everyday we share together, we grow closer and closer and become more in sync with one another.  I still wake up every morning and am amazed that I get to be with such an amazing, loving, respectful, caring man. 

I have been thinking a lot about life lately-- My life has been easy for the most part.  Don't get me wrong my family has gone through some valleys.. but for the most part it has been good. 

I have always been a follower of Christ, but I think my love and relationship for Christ really grew when I went off to college.  I realized there were two roads to choose from, one that offered eternal life, grace, love and mercy.  The other that offered emptiness, always longing for something, hopelessness, and ultimately death.  I choose the first.  I pressed into God and wanted to learn more about him.  When I was 20 I got diagnosed with Malignant Melanoma.  I remember my dad coming into my room at 7:00 in the morning as I was packing up to go back to school.  He said the Dr had called and told him we needed to go and meet with the surgeon that day.  I was shocked-- I was scared.  I remember thinking to myself, "God how in the world could you allow this to happen.  I have prayed for purity and good health, and you are allowing this badness to grow in me.."  I questioned for a while.  But after going through this experience I realized exactly why he had me walk through this.

As I walked down the halls of MD Anderson Cancer Hospital in downtown Houston, I realized how much of a self-centered and shallow life I had been living.  I realized the things I thought were important in life, were not important at all.  I had NO idea how many people were affected with Cancer.  I had NO idea the magnitude of people diagnosed and treated every second of everyday.  ...(I will not get started on this topic-- that is for another post because I could go on and on) I saw their hurt and their pain as I walked by

I was very fortunate that by God's grace  and with the Dr.'s help healing was bestowed on me and I was ok.  This experience changed the way I viewed life, I grew so much closer to God then I had ever been, I saw life differently.  For these reasons I was thankful. But as time elapsed, so had my thoughts of Cancer, what I had seen, and what I had felt.

Life recently has been so good.  I can't even begin to describe it, it almost has felt too good to be true.  I have been blessed with a loving husband who exceeds all my dreams of a husband, a beautiful home,  an amazing family, a brother who has finally gotten his act together :), a church home in which we have met the most wonderful friends.  A few weekends ago we had "Croquet Sunday" at my parents house.  I sat there that day and just took it all in...  My beautiful family, the laughter, the good food, the fun, the beautiful day with a crystal clear blue sky, a breeze and the love that was flowing between each of us.  The contentment I felt was like no other, it was like I was being told to savor this moment and I did...  Here are a few pictures from the day...

My mom was the photographer (doing what she loves) which is why she is not in any of the pictures... My heart was so very full that day.

It's amazing how things can change within a few weeks. This past week my mom was diagnosed with Breast Cancer.  The news of this hit me like a ton of bricks, as there have been no signs, no warnings.  She will have to have a double Mastectomy along with Chemotherapy.  We are still unsure of the magnitude of the cancer, she will be going for a full body scan this week to determine if it has spread.

My heart now feels like it has been ripped wide open.  I hurt for the process she is going to have to go through, for the pain she will experience, for the questions she has even though she is a strong believer, and for the unsureness of the situation.  I have sat and listened to a song by my husband's band Gatlin Elms.  The song is called "Stronger."  The lyrics have been so encouraging to me-- as they basically state-- We aren't strong enough-- but "Christ" has broken through the clouds, filled our hearts with HOPE--  his love is enough-- our hearts can not get enough-- he never fades and never disappears..we are stronger now because of his love, We are stronger now..... I know with his love, his hope, his strength we can get through this.

This news has served as a reminder to me just how fragile life is, and how quickly it can change. It sounds cliche because you hear it a lot.  I have woken up every morning since last Monday and things feel different. The sun looks just that much brighter, the trees look just that much greener,  and my mom's voice on the other end of the phone is just that much sweeter.  I know these next few months are going to be very challenging for my family.  But I am thankful that we do not have to be strong enough by ourselves-- we can rely on him for the strength we need. I am hopeful for the healing he will give her.